Klint's

A few days back, the Nigerian internet scene was literally broken by Olori Wuraola, brand new the wife of the Ooni of Ife, His Imperial Majesty, Adeyeye Ogunwusi over comments made by her, regarding the struggle for 'gender equality '. For those who are not in the know, let me as an aside, inform you that the Ooni of Ife is undoubtedly, the most recent First Class traditional ruler in Nigeria, and I dare say, the most modern King in Nigeria, rivalled only by the Emir of Kano. Having given that rather unsolicited lecture, let me redirect your mind to the essence of this discourse... A few days back, while giving a speech at the Emerging Women's Forum in far away, United States of America, the queen of Ile Ife made what I'd rather refer to as a bold statement when she fearlessly affirmed before an American audience, famed for it's walk and agitation for equality of women to men, that WOMEN can NEVER be equal to men. This was by all standards, a bold statement and...

Growing up was interesting. It was comforting within my beleaguered environment to be a kid. You would play all day without caution after all, Mama wasn’t always at home. I had a friend, a very close friend as it were. He was Musa. Musa was the only Kid in the hood who knew a lot about street games. He was the game master. For instance, Musa taught me to roll tyres, build sand houses with my legs and hunt grasshoppers. Musa was good at the games he taught. There used to be this grasshopper nicknamed “Champion”. It was the littlest but nimblest creature we ever knew but it never was an uphill task for musa. He would besiege this poor little thing with masterful mischief and then cup it in his hands effortlessly. We usually rounded up Musa to admire his catch. For many months, Musa was exclusively the only person who could get a ‘champion’. While we prayed to get this prey, Musa skedaddled into the field to have some more display of his adeptness. He was just...

“I spit on the face of the rebels, the rodents, and the cockroaches. The cockroaches and adder are the principalities that have come to planet earth with the sole aim of ruining and puncturing destinies. Liars! I will tread upon you cockroaches with little need for insecticides. You have no place here…Die! Die!! Die!!!” Jesus! (Ade screamed) Ade, for the umpteenth time, had this rather intense dream which got his bed pitifully soaked. He almost instantly found himself narrating the indeed disturbing dream to his mother who rapidly came to her only son’s aid. Ade was the only son and infact, he was the only child of his parents. His father was a big pastor in one of the TOP churches situated at rivers state. His mom, popularly called Mama Ade, was a devout Christian and a role model to a plenitude of Christians and even non-Christians. They were not in the class of Dangote but then they were comfortable wth two soft rides, a duplex and a fat bank account. Ade sta...

I can't remember the exact time of the year but I know it was sometime, late in 2005 when I heard from my father that for the first time since 1994, the Super Eagles of Nigeria will not be making an appearance at the FIFA World Cup Finals. Like every avid football fan, it was a bitter pill to swallow but in the midst of my disappointment and disillusionment, I got to know that a Nigerian had led the tiny West African Country of Togo to qualify for the World Cup for the first time in their history. That was my very first introduction to the legend of Stephen Okechukwu Keshi. So many years later, after Nigerian Football witnessed another footballing tragedy owing to the Super Eagles' failure to qualify for the 2012 African Cup of Nations. This time around, the handlers of the National Team decided it was time to let Keshi into the picture, and from there, the only way for Nigerian football was up. The following year, Nigeria won the African Cup of Nations in grand style; Lat...

I sat in front of Mama’s stall, hurling curses after curses at my brother who had tricked me into spending the holiday with Grandma in Kaduna. “It will be fun, you will get the chance to explore a new culture and meet new friends. Especially the pretty Hausa chicks, plus you know grandma is rich, you will probably get enough money to buy that new phone” he had said. Knowing my love for adventure and money, I could not decline and I decided to go, at least to enjoy the North.. Little did I know that such decision would change my life forever. Now here I stand in this heat, swatting at flies and other insects as they hover round my fresh yellow skin. I turn to look at the passersby, watching them stop and haggle for things while imagining the lives they lead. The pregnant lady for instance with the big bag was the wife of an Alhaji, the 5th one judging from her age and the way she rubbed her tummy frequently, I assumed she had been trying to conceive for a long time, ...

I love the idea of pressing his mumu button. I love to boss him around. I like the fact that he's under my control. But I don't want that kinda man. I can't love that kinda man. For all its worth, a man should be in control. Never mind that some emotionally displaced women are fighting for equality now. I like a man in control of his woman even when the woman in question is so fine and brings out the mumu in men. My name is Obiageli. I'm a Nigerian girl. I know what I want and this man looking at me like i'm some work of magic, isn't what I want.      Our men don't understand, they will never understand, why we prefer cash over flowers 💐 Nigeria is a tough place to live in. The climate is harsh. Our parents are too unfeeling. Our men are opposite of romantic. And love, doesn't exist here. Not even a teeny weeny itsy bitsy. I remember being a foolish virgin back then in the University. I was living comfortably and I had a boyfriend ofcourse...

I love the idea of pressing his mumu button. I love to boss him around. I like the fact that he's under my control. But I don't want that kinda man. I can't love that kinda man. For all its worth, a man should be in control. Never mind that some emotionally displaced women are fighting for equality now. I like a man in control of his woman even when the woman in question is so fine and brings out the mumu in men. My name is Obiageli. I'm a Nigerian girl. I know what I want and this man looking at me like i'm some work of magic, isn't what I want.      Our men don't understand, they will never understand, why we prefer cash over flowers 💐 Nigeria is a tough place to live in. The climate is harsh. Our parents are too unfeeling. Our men are opposite of romantic. And love, doesn't exist here. Not even a teeny weeny itsy bitsy. I remember being a foolish virgin back then in the University. I was living comfortably and I had a boyfriend ofcourse...

MUSINGS OF THE WAILER My First Market Experience ... "Madam how much for rice?" I asked in my usual style-pretentiously indifferent as to the price of the item to be bought. After all, I usually had no scruples in footing my bills. "Paint rubber na 1500. The small rubber na 1000 Oga" She replied with a smile to cushion whatever second thoughts the price could inject in my brain. It would have been better she didn't add "OGA" just at the end of the statement. These sellers sef. They have a way of making you do what you wouldn't want to do just by calling you names. No! I wasn't going to give in to her ruse. Never! "Madam, forget Oga eee. Oga for where? Buhari don change everything o. Pocket don change. How much you dey sell am for last price? You no sell rubber for 700?" I closed one eye and brought out a tongue to show her I was bluffing. Deep down I was too serious to be joking. Wait o. Come to think of it. So rice is 1000 naira...